Walking with a limp

I keep trying to walk with a straight leg but I don’t have that anymore.

I have a limp.

It’s more work to walk with a limp. It hurts. It slows me down.

But I can hear the voice of my Elder and friend in my head.   In my very first training on teaching many years ago, he taught us: ‘Never trust a teacher who doesn’t walk with a limp.

Letter to a friend

Dear pal,

I totally understand why you’re feeling all that.

At the end of the day – you want to feel loved and supported in this, not just know that you are.  And it’s easy to think - if God loves you and He holds all the cards why won’t He just fix this?  At least one part of it.

I’m guessing Jesus felt something similar on the night before the Cross. I’m guessing, sitting in the garden – deeply believing that the Father was worthy - He asked the question:  ‘Is this really the only way? You’re sovereign and you’re perfect so can’t we figure out another way to do this?

Our Uncomposed God

I’m typing this sitting in a doctors office in Boston, Massachusetts.  I’ve traveled across the country to sit in a chair beside one of my dearest friends in the world and so I can hold her hand while people say really hard things to her and operate on her and give her shots in very unpleasant places.

Recently, I have a bit of an empathy situation. It’s out of control and awkward.  Today my sweet strong friend was doing AWESOME in her appointment and there I was – on the verge of tears.  Hold it together fabs. Hold it together.

Resources on depression

Obviously the internet is all a-twitter (see what I did there) with the topic of depression.

I’m not a medical professional.  But I am a human who trusts in Jesus and has struggled with depression.

So I’m going to share the most helpful resource I have ever found on the topic.  It’s not technical.  It doesn’t have any big words.  But when I read it I felt like someone had put words (no- pictures) to how I had been feeling.  I immediately started sending it to all my friends saying: This!  This is how I feel!!

For the broken days

[My sweet pal Annie wrote this for me a couple of weeks back, on the anniversary of my dad's death. I'm hopeful it will minister to you as much as it ministered to me.]

Every day is broken.

But today feels broken.

I share this dark and broken day with a very close friend of mine. Three years ago today, her dad passed away on my dad’s birthday. This day will forever link our hearts together. Every year, this day comes and I’m doubly broken. I’m broken for the pain she must relive every year on this haunting day. I’m broken for another year that my dad’s birthday won’t be celebrated.