The gift of lost luxury

I don’t know what to share on this blog these days.

I  don’t have a ton of time right now. Two jobs.  A pilot study.  An internship. Full time school.  Writing is just having to take a back seat for a season. I’ve assumed, that’s why these pages have stayed relatively empty, but, if I’m honest – there’s another problem: I don’t know what to say anymore.

There is a luxury I have lost. It is the luxury of sharing opinions publicly that never threaten your closest community because they all agree with you. 

Some new year new resources

I love new years.  Not New Years Eve or Day, but the concept of a new year.  I think it’s because it feels like an ebeneezer: a mark in the ground to say – we have made it another year.  And I’m also a big fan of looking backwards and considering, thanking, learning from our failures and celebrating our gifts.

Each year I spend some time answering questions that help me think through the year gone by and dream for the year ahead.  This year, I built out some worksheets that help me consider my goals in light of my values (and incorporate some of what I’m learning about right now in school!)

4 ways to be there for friends who are hurting

When I was in college I got a phone call in the middle of the night from one of my besties.  She was crying so hard it took me a few full minutes to untangle her words and realize that her mother had died suddenly of a Brain Aneurism.

I remember in the season that followed learning the incredible pain of caring for the grieving.  I remember the horrible feelings of being out of control, of watching someone you love hurt.  I remember thinking, perhaps naively, let me take this pain from her. 

Be Valuable

The Tuesday after December 5th, 2013 I drove with a friend up to our church offices to pick up a DVD I needed.  It was late.  Past midnight.  But I needed that DVD for the memorial service that was happening later that week.

I walked into that office that night for the first time since hearing that my co-worker had been taken from us. I wanted to get in and get out, afraid of that place and the feelings it would force me to face. I knew the DVD was on the far side of the office in my mailbox, but I went straight for the cabinet by my desk.  I knew there was something unspeakably precious to me in the top drawer: a scrap of paper with a joke written across it in sharpie.

Old dreams and new jobs

Ten years ago, I officially fell in love with my first local church.  I sat in one of the pastors offices and I told him: “I’m all in. I’ll do whatever this church wants.” I was young(er) and cocky(ier) and sure about who I was. I told him my gifts, where I wanted to serve, but explained I would do whatever our body needed.

In life, there are a few moments when you are sure of what God wants you to do.  That was one of them for me.

It didn’t work out.