There are too many posts I want to write today.
I want to write a post about how today proves how wrong we can be about the story. We can feel like it’s all over. Every sense and all our logic can conspire to convince us that Satan has won. We can look around and seemingly see evidence that failure has overcome fight and darkness has dissolved the light and despair has cannibalized hope. And we can be wrong. What looks and feels like the end might actually be the beginning. The days that are darkest might prove in time to be the days of greatest light.
I want to write a post about how today redefines what it looks like to be loved by God. Sometimes God’s love doesn’t look like deliverance from pain, it looks like sending angels to strengthen you to endure the greatest possible pain.
I want to write about unanswered prayers. This Good Friday deafens our ears with the resounding ‘No’ from the Father to Jesus’ prayer for the cup to pass. This Good Friday proves that the source of all His “no’s” is an epic love and a cosmic story. God says ‘no’ – not because He doesn’t care about us – but because He does. Let today settle it, for the Father to answer some prayers with a ‘yes’ would be a cruel act against His nature.
I want to write a post about the sufficiency of the blood of Christ to cover all that we would dare to do; to cover every envious thought and every adulterous action. Today we can all celebrate: those who feel filled with faith and high from overcoming temptation and those who feel empty and afraid, ashamed of their failure. Because our hope is not found in the strength of our feelings of faith or the number of days since we last failed. Our hope is in the unchanging and unfailing blood of Christ.
I want to write a post about what it feels like to meet this Jesus. This Man, who gazed into the cup of anguish, and saw the horror and was willing to pray “not my will, but Yours.” He drank every drop for us. What must it be like to walk into the wrath of the Father for the sake of those who will use your name as a punchline and your death as a joke?
I want to write a post about the glory of this Father. This God, who loves us so much that He would not just die for us, but that He would send His only Son to die. What must it be like to offer up the Person you love most in all the world to make a way to give His inheritance to the very people who killed Him?
I want to write a post about the Spirit of God. This Spirit who is the prize and purchase of this bloody day. The Spirit who IS the love that dances between the Father and the Son and now has been poured out into our hearts so that the love of God is literally in us.
But I won’t write any of those posts today. I will take this full heart to the feet of the Father and sing to Him my unwritten words.
“Though the witch knew the Deep Magic, there is a magic deeper still which she did not know. Her knowledge goes back only to the dawn o time. But if she could have looked a little further back, into the stillness and the darkness before Time dawned, she would have read there a different incantation. She would have known that when a willing victim who had committed no treachery was killed in a traitor’s stead, the Table would crack and Death itself would start working backwards.” – The Lion, the Witch an the Wardrobe