I don't know how you found your way to this page, and I don't know where you are in your story and what makes sense for you financially or otherwise. 

What I do know is that life is messy and hard.  I know that too many of us are caught off guard by that, alone in it, and not sure how to work through it.  

I have found that when we stop trying to outrun the messy, when we stop trying to skip the process, there are diamonds to be found in the dirt. I have found myself face to face with Jesus in the dark, and He seems clearer here than He ever did in the shiny perfection of Instagram posts with flowery fonts. 

I want to give Him to you.  I want us to give Him to each other. I want to create spaces and resources and tools that help people find Jesus in the messy; in the dark - instead of on the other side. 

Why Subscribe?

Here’s what you can expect:

• EVERYONE will get thoughts in their inbox. I’m aiming for monthly!

• Paid subscribers will get more regular and messy thoughts. More things that haven’t been overly edited, and aren’t finished thoughts, but more current ponderings.

• Paid subscribers will also get access to my podcast-ish thing.

• Anyone can log-in at any time and catch up on thoughts they missed that are available to them (public ones available to anyone!)

• You can also become a Patron if you’d rather do that instead of being a subscriber. I think of my patrons as sort of a board of directors. I bounce ideas off them. And also - in my dark nights of feeling like I have lost my dreams with this Long Covid life, I look at my list of patrons and they truly help me feel like I can keep going.

Why do you charge for some stuff?

On this newsletter/site I’m able to put some things behind a pay-wall, (things like my podcast, and more of my messy thoughts).

And here’s why I like that: it makes me feel safer. To me - it means the people reading those thoughts probably have some kind of buy-in or experience with me. And so I feel a little freer to be in-process. Maybe the people reading or listening will hear things with more context. It doesn’t eliminate the chance of my words being taken out of time or intention to be used in ways I wouldn’t want, but it certainly feels like it is a step in that direction.

My goal isn’t for my words to reach as many people as possible. It’s for my thoughts to reach the people who might be helped by them. And that seems more likely to happen if the people reading them have some history or context of a relationship with me (even if that is just on the internet).